Aw Punkin...

Look at this. Our first picture of the week is NOT GRETCHEN SCREAMING! It's a miracle. I know. In fact we didn't get ONE picture of Gretchen screaming this week! HOORAY!!!!



But we did get this shot...



...and this one (this one is like a puzzle. Can you count the hazards in this photo? Leave your answers in the comment section. Person with the most wins a PRIZE!)



Last Monday we went to visit Ella's BFF's casa. Her mom gave them a playdate-birthday-party. With homemade Tres Leches Cake. OMG. So GOOD! And now, a month later, her birthday is OFFICIALLY OVER. And yes, we're planning her 6th birthday party already. At least Ella is.



This is what's left after Gretchen ate her strawberries. Apparently Baby likes her strawberries.



Look, matching ballerina outfits!!!!




The girls found an old skateboard while we were cleaning out. It's now sitting in the middle of the hall. Cause that's a good place for it, right?



How many times have we been to the pumpkin patch in the past five days? THREE TIMES. This is the only time I brought my camera (you're welcome). Look at how pretty these pumpkins are. Awwww... Credit for Gretchen's hat goes to Stefanie, the most amazing knitting lady ever.



Gretchen's dress could NOT STAY ON. After this I pinned it. But she flashed a lot of people before I fixed it. (And yes, I realize this is the THIRD topless toddler pic on this post alone, and yes, I also realize that the first one was not censored.)




We went on a hay ride. Nothing screams "FUN" like riding on a trailer full of hay bales while sharp bits of dried grass imbed themselves into your thighs. Come on guys! Lets do it again! (Notice how Gretchen is trying to escape in this photo, but I'm trying to cover it up with my head-tilt-smile-everything's-fine-pose.)





On Saturday, before Auntie Amber called to rescue me from the girls, I mean take them to the Pumpkin Patch for the 2nd time, the only thing keeping Gretchen happy was:
1. If I held her in my lap like a baby (her words)
2. If I put the blanket over her head. MUST BE OVER HER HEAD.
3. If I put her keyboard across our laps so she could play music while in recline.
(Check out her expression. She knows she's getting away with something.)


So for Halloween, Ella wants to be Casper The Friendly Ghost. Her idea. Gretchen's costume will be provided by Colby. (Remember Ella's costume circa Halloween '06? Let me remind you, it consisted of a black plastic trash bag with head and arm holes cut out, red duct tape around the waist, and fairy wings. She was a demon baby. Cute.) Stay tuned to see what he comes up with THIS TIME. I know, I can't wait either.

Unexpected Harvesty-Fall Stuff

Here's the required 1st-post-picture of Gretchen smile/grimacing/whining for the camera. But this week it's topless. Nice!

Gretchen whining? How unexpected!



What else was unexpected? Uncle Ian coming to visit! Hooray for Uncle Ian! And also unexpected? Uncle Ian's awesome brick-red, um....haircut. No one rocks the "Mr. T" quite like Uncle Ian. Ella loaned him some extra necklaces from her birthday party to help him with his Look.



How nice is Uncle Ian? Nice enough to drive 8 hours so we could take Auntie Krista to sushi for her birthday dinner. Grandma and Grandpa even came (they got the chicken dinner).

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KRISTA! Sorry about Gretchen licking your face last week!



This is how Colby looks from Ella's perspective. I think it explains many things in their relationship.



Gretchen loves ALL her cousins, but Shaunte holds a special place in the girls hearts. They LOVE him. In a slightly overwhelming, "Can you please get your kids off me" kind of way. Here they are, reunited after, I don't know, EIGHTEEN MONTHS? Yeah, I'm pretty sure Gretchen was only 3 months old last time they met. But her devotion runs deep.



Ella's BFF moved. We now have to drive an hour to visit her. Not cool. But we visited a few weeks ago. Ella crashed C's ballet class. Isn't this the cutest thing ever?



Also cute? Lamas. I know. Ella's school had a Harvest Festival this week. GOOD TIMES.



Last night the ward had a Barn Dance Social. I now know the Electric Slide. I'd survived 33 years without that knowledge, but decided to learn it and OWN IT. If you want lessons, I can totally teach you. Also, Cotton Eye'd Joe. (Which is funny, cause I distinctly remember dancing at the Vortex in SLC circa Fall '94 to that song. But now I know the "REAL" dance to it. And I learned it in the "Cultural Hall" at church. Awesome. Ok, maybe that's not really funny. I am old. The end.)

REASONS MY CHILDREN ARE AWESOME:
Last night at the Barn Dance...
Seminary Teacher: How are you doing Gretchen?
Gretchen: (pulls pants down)
(later)
Seminary Teacher: Hello Ella, how are you?
Ella: Tickle Tickle Tickle (tickles his belly)
Seminary Teacher: Um, you're not supposed to do that to people, sweetheart...

Yes, my children both sexually harassed the Seminary Teacher. Within an hour. So very proud.

So what are your plans this week? Hitting the Vortex? If you are, you should totally call me....

xo

Gretchen Rose Is The Harbinger Of Chaos

I don't need a Cylon to warn me, Gretchen cannot be trusted. And yes, this is going to be one of those blog posts where I complain about my toddler. This afternoon alone:

-She scattered a box of cereal across the living room floor. And threw in some pretzels just for fun.

-Despite the fact that I keep my chair far, far away from my glass-topped art desk specifically for this reason, she still found a way to climb onto my desk and open the pen drawer. You know, the pen drawer that I moved to the top of my art desk to keep her out of it. Then she found a black permanent marker and colored her leg. And her arm. And her hand (so she can say "Bye Bye!" and show off her ink. She showed me.) And the sweet little B&W photo of Ella & Gretchen I have hanging at my desk. They now both have blacked in eyes and gaping black mouths. It's a little "Black-Hole-Sun". Awesome.

-While I was making dinner she did the classic "MOMMA MOMMA MOMMA" whine-cry/step-on-my-feet-while-simultaneously-pushing-me-from-the-counter for approx 10 minutes. I thought I bought her happiness with a few slices of cheese, but then realized she snuck one of the chocolate cupcakes we made for tomorrow's Harvest Festival & smushed it into the carpet in front of the TV. After that was cleaned up, I found the cupcake wrapper chewed into a lovely little turd-shaped curl that she left next to the water filter. Aw, thanks Gretch!

-Apparently full of stolen chocolate cupcakes, she then proceeded to grab handfuls of her dinner and rub them into her shirt. When her dinner was confiscated, she took her sippee cup & shook it onto the dinner table. Then she splashed her fists in it. Then she laughed. Then she cried because I took her milk away too. Then Auntie Krista showed up and took pity on her. Then Gretchen LICKED HER FACE. Auntie Krista didn't have much pity for her after that.

-She brought me another chunk of hair that she'd removed from her sister's head.

-She is now in bed.

What am I going to do with this kid? Anyone? Anyone?

Happy Birthdays!

This week....
Gretchen did a striking Sasquatch impression and foraged for food in the background. She likes Grandma & Grandpa's grapes.


I know, practically separated at birth...


Last Sunday, or "Ella's Actual Birthday", we had cake and presents.



What's that? AN EASY BAKE OVEN? Boo-yah! We busted that bad boy out after school on Monday. 1.5" cookies baked under a 100 watt light bulb with adult supervision? Delicious!!! Thanks Auntie Amber & Uncle Dan!



We continued the Birthday Celebration by going out to eat on Monday. In-N-Out! Why yes, those ARE teal leggings with socks under her skirt. Why do you ask?



Gretch got in on some sticker action. And ate almost 1/2 a burger by herself. Dude.



This Saturday was the Big Party! Auntie Amber led the girls in some rousing games (both Ella's boyfriends had soccer games, so they didn't get there till later... But look at how cute these girls are!) Red Light, Green Light. Mother May I. Good times.



Does Amber have some competition? Gretchen was totally working Uncle Dan.



After lunch we had our Dance Off! Woot!!!



These girls were serious dancers. SERIOUS.



After the Dance Off, Ella opened presents. Who's that in the background? IT'S MISS VALERIE! Ella's favorite Preschool Teacher came to her party? How awesome is that? I know!!!!



Good times being had by all...



Then, the TREASURE HUNT!!!



Miss Valerie took pity on the kids and helped them interpret my map. (Apparently I need some cartography lessons.)


Action Shot!





Gretchen isn't really sure what's going on, but she knows it's awesome!



So yay! That's it! We had a great time. Wish y'all could have been there.

Loves!