Gigantic Mountains and Ginormous Milestones

Hello, dear friends and family. We had a fantastic week. I was a productive little lady (I'm 1/2 way done with my freelance project! Yay!). And Ella graduated kindergarten.

On Memorial Day we got a glimpse of what the summer will be like. It was beautiful. We started our celebrations at Target (don't be jealous) and got sunscreen. The girls got their first sunburns the previous Saturday when the apartment pool opened and we went for a quick swim. Quick because we were out of sunscreen. Now they have little tan lines. Who's kids are these? Apparently they don't follow the Robertson tradition of burn/peel/burn/peel/skin cancer... But we're still going to keep them covered in sunscreen for the rest of their natural lives.

We went on a hike to the top of RATTLESNAKE MOUNTAIN. Doesn't that sound brilliant and scary? It's actually more of a foothill, but RATTLESNAKE FOOTHILL doesn't carry the same weight as RATTLESNAKE MOUNTAIN. Climbing the top of this, ahem, mountain was on my list of "Things To Do Before We Move". (Do you like how I'm thinking positively because of COURSE Colby will be getting a job soon and it probably won't be in Northern Nevada. Which makes me sad, because I really love Northern Nevada. But immensely happy because HELLO!!! Jobs = Money = Happiness. Really, money can buy happiness. Don't believe what they tell you.)

Here's how the hike went.
Great! - 5 minutes
Good - 15 minutes
(Almost to the top) HORRIBLE - 10 minutes
(Reached the top)
Handed out snacks and juice boxes.
(Began track down)
HORRIBLE - 15 minutes

Good thing it was a short hike.

Gretchen pretending it was fun to hike:


Look! I made it! Can I have fruit snacks now?



I'm getting all the good pictures from graduation later today. I'll put them in a separate post. Goodbye, best kindergarten teacher ever!!!


In keeping with the tradition of overdoing it and general ridiculousness, I carved a watermelon for the kindergarten graduation BBQ into the shape of a bee (the class mascot). I wasn't going to do anything that crazy, but my friend J dared me to do it. So of course then I had to.


And, since I know you're all waiting with baited breath to find out about my pioneer dress, it is DONE!!! Yes, it is done and it is almost fabulous. It's kind of got a high waist (where my actual waist is instead of at the top of my hips), but it fits and it's almost kind of cute. Almost. It's definitely not doing anything for my figure. People may assume I'm a pregnant pioneer. I'm ok with that. Especially since my "Pioneer Ancestor" that I'm doing family history work on had a baby en route. (Can you even imagine being 9 months pregnant while walking across the plains? Kill me now.)

I got so excited about finishing that sewing project that I went to Savers and bought an awesome old pillowcase and made Ella a dress and Gretchen a matching skirt. I'm going to try to put them in them for church today. And then take a picture. We'll see how that goes...

Wish us luck with our first week of summer. I know Ella was only in school for 2.5 hours a day, but DUDE, that 2.5 hours made all the difference. (Where is Ella right now? Pouting somewhere because I told her I was going to beat her bum if she didn't clean up her dress-ups RIGHT NOW. There is beauty all around, when there's love at home....)

Fun Facts

Fun Fact #1:

We don't cry in kindergarten. Since they've finished their end-of-year testing, Ella's kindergarten class has been winding down. They've been "practicing" having recess every day. It's supposed to help them get ready for the experience they'll have next year when they're in school for 6 hours. And yeah, practice has been going pretty well. I think they have it down.

Sometime last week Ella tripped and fell in the "protective" wood chips. She showed me the cuts in her hand and then told me, "I didn't cry, even though it hurt really bad. We don't cry in kindergarten."

Fun Fact #2:

Ella will now be known as "April the Second". She told me that when she was a baby, she wanted me to name her April. Apparently I got it wrong. I told her we can call her that from now on.

Fun Fact #3:

When you cut out a pattern, you should make sure you really make sure you CUT THE RIGHT SIZE. Yeah. And the size you buy your pants at Target is NOT the size you cut out for a pattern. Remember that "Pioneer Dress" I've been working on? Apparently I cut it out 3 sizes too small. I think we can salvage it though. I've got some help. I'll keep you posted. I have other fabric to make an elastic waist skirt, so I may just be sporting that on our hike. We'll see.

Other Facts:
-The pool opened at our apartment, so you're all invited to come swimming with us.
-Ella has her kindergarten graduation this week (sniff), so next week's news should be full of overly-sentimental musings from an emotional mom.
-I spoke in church today. I HATE SPEAKING IN PUBLIC. But it went ok. Mostly just glad it's over.
-We're looking forward to our trip to CA for 4th of July. YAY!!!!

So what's up with you? Have any fun facts to share?

The Dentist Incident

We had some excitement this week when we babysat Ella's BFF while her mom & husband went on vacation. For four whole days. (Why yes, I AM crazy and take on more than I can handle on a regular basis, why do you ask? See also: Kindergarten yearbook, my volunteer work, the "Pioneer" dress I'm attempting to sew for Trek, plus all my freelance work, etc.) So where was I, oh yes, babysitting. The first day was....not great. We'll call her Starling. Starling is an only child (so far) and is NOT used to sharing with small children. Gretchen is two and is NOT used to sharing either. That was fun. I made both Gretchen AND Starling cry. It wasn't on purpose. But we had a "Come To Jesus" talk. It worked. By the time Thursday rolled around, I was totally handling three kids. (And by "Totally Handling", I mean I was only pulling my hair out every hour instead of every 15 minutes.)

Remember how Ella's teeth were coming in? And how her baby teeth were still firmly in place? And how my phobia of tooth loss prevented me from "twisting" them (as per the Dentist's instructions)? And how every time Colby got near her with "twisting intent" she would scream so loud that the ceiling shook? Yeah, we took her to the Dentist to get them pulled. Bribery didn't work.

This is how it went:

1. Ella threw a HUGE MESSY FIT in the parking lot. I literally had to drag her across the street to the dentist's office. I'm pretty sure the Grown Up Dentists office called the Childrens Dentist office & tipped them off. They had a "Screamer". Oh yes, they did. And Starling kept saying, "Why is she screaming like that, it's hurting my ears." You know, cause OF COURSE I took an extra child on this errand.
2. We finally got Ella in a "Procedure Chair" and sufficiently threatened/bribed/drugged, (kudos to the Dental Hygienist. She totally rocked.) Dental Hygenist Lady was able to wiggle out one of the teeth once Ella was sedated. Starling was mesmerized.

Starling - What's all that red stuff?
Dental Hygienist - Don't worry about it, it's just red stuff. (She totally lied!)
Me - Do you want to sit outside the room, Starling? There's a movie you can watch, you don't have to sit in here.
Starling - No, I want to stay in here with you. That's not just red stuff, it's blood.
Dental Hygienist - Don't worry, sweetie. Why don't you go sit down.
Starling - I don't feel so good.

At this point, Starling is literally as pale as Edward. Her lips have a blue tint. And she faints. SHE FREAKIN' FAINTED!!! Luckily I was right there & caught her. Then I rocked her while she came to and THREW UP. Oh my gosh. This poor child. The Hygienist ran to get the Dentist. I assured them that Starling had no pre-existing conditions (except apparently a HUGE AVERSION TO THE SIGHT OF BLOOD.) She had a juice box. While I dealt with Starling, the dentist snuck in and pulled Ella's extra tooth.

She wasted no time. THEY WERE VERY GLAD TO SEE US GO.

What I learned:
-Never take someone else's kid on a "Medical Errand". Just don't.
-Our insurance does not cover tooth extractions. DUDE! SO EXPENSIVE!!!
-Next time Ella gets a loose tooth, we're holding her down & taking pliers to it. She can use the $ we've saved on Dental bills to pay for her therapy.

Pre-Extraction. Hi baby teeth!!!


With the Happy Gas. (Ella's reaction to Happy Gas = Very Goofy. She was giggling the whole time Starling was having her incident. She didn't even notice. She was busy watching Dora. When her tooth was yanked, she said, "Ow!" and then giggled some more.)


Good thing she's cute.

Oh Yeah, Thanks Mom

Did you do anything special for Mother's Day this year? Colby took the girls to Target yesterday and they picked me out a lovely metal water bottle and a box of chocolates (# of times this morning Gretchen has asked me to "share" = 5,893.) They greeted the sun with joyful exclamations around 6-freakin'-thirty this morning. Colby & I played the If-I-Lay-Very-Still-And-Feign-Sleep-Maybe-The-Other-Person-Will-Wake-Up-And-Take-Care-Of-Them game. (It's super fun. Do you ever play?) I finally got up around 8 to change Gretchen's first Mother's Day Poopy Diaper (thanks sweetie! Lets eat some more yogurt, mkay?) But then I took a bath (blessedly alone, much to Gretchen's chagrin.) And I gave myself a haircut. So today is getting better. Plus, after church we're going to Ella's kindergarten teacher's house for Mother's Day Dinner. (I'm bringing spinach salad with strawberries, candied pecans and poppy-seed dressing. YuuuUUUUm.)

So have I told y'all yet that Colby and I are doing a Pioneer Trek this summer? "What's that?" you may ask. It's when a bunch of youth and youth leaders from church dress up as pioneers and pull a handcart across the desert for 4 days. "Why would you want to do that?" you may wonder. And I'm not really sure. But everyone we talk to who's participated before raves on and on about how wonderful it is. I'm totally getting sucked in by the hype. At first I was all, "What the H-E-double-hockey-sticks? (content edited for family blog.)" But then I realized how awesome it'd be to see Colby away from his laptop for four days straight surrounded by crabby teenagers in historic-dress & realized we couldn't pass this up. I went to a meeting a few months ago and got the "Ma and Pa Handbook". Colby and I are "Parents" and we'll have 10 - 12 kids in our "Family". The handbooks said things like, "No electronics allowed, you get to be your OWN SPIRITUAL IPOD!" (I'm not making this up.) So we're going to work on memorizing some hymns. Maybe I'll get Colby to bring his guitar and learn some songs OTHER than Willie Nelson's "Crazy". I could bring my Hammered Dulcimer (that's totally historic, right?) and play some jigs. It's going to be fun. I seriously am excited by this. Now I just need to find someone to take on the girls for 4 days. Gulp.

Dear Little Family-

Thanks for my super cute water bottle! As per your suggestion, I WILL use it when I go to the gym. (That wasn't a hint on their part, I really do go to the gym. Even if you can't tell.) And the chocolate is so good that I will not be eating it in your presence because I don't want to share. LOVE YA!

Dear Mom-

Thanks for being my Mom. I hope you have a fun day and that Christian doesn't listen to his Rock Music CD. (Sorry I made him that.) Give Baby Teagan lots of kisses from me!

Dear Mother-In-Law-

Thanks for being the best MIL in the whole wide world. We miss you so much. You are great.

Dear Grandma-

Thanks for always keeping fudgesicles in your freezer for me. You're always so thoughtful. We're so lucky!

Dear Grandma JoEllen-

We miss you!

Happy Mothers Day Everybody!

Birthday Bonanza

Whoa. We've had quite a fortnight. Ella was FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY picked as the *Star Student* at school, which means she got to bring "Buzzing Bee" home (the class mascot), and bring in a poster covered with her favorite family photots. She also got to fill in an info sheet All About Ella. I learned some things. Like that she wants to be a bus driver when she grows up. Suh-weet!

Star-Student Friday coincided with Earth Day. They attempted to make ice cream. (It ended up being kind of a cold milk with sugar/milkshake, but they were sure excited about it...)



And they played LEAP FROG. Cause nothing says "Earth DAY" more than laminated disposable paper lily pads, right?



Ella may have been most excited about the Star Student thing, but MY weekend was even cooler. Mostly because I have the bestest friends in the whole wide world. My BFF/SoulSister-4-Eva, Lismarie, bought me a SURPRISE TICKET TO SEATTLE. She even worked it out with Colby so that I could leave the girls at home. I HAD A WEEKEND AWAY IN SEATTLE WITH NO CHILDREN. Yes, it was a slice of heaven.

Lismarie picked me up from the airport Friday afternoon, then we drove by my old house. Ok, you know that I have some "feelings" about my old house. How much I miss it. How much I loved it. It was so great to drive by and see it look EXACTLY THE SAME. And it looked like a cute little family lived there. The wisteria I planted was finally blooming, and the whole house looked so cute. I MISS YOU, LITTLE HOUSE IN THE "REGENTRIFIED ARTIST COMMUNITY" GHETTO!!!

We drove up the street and admired the adorable Pea Patch (neighborhood garden). They finally restored the Hat of the Hat & Boots. It all looked so good. The neighborhood looked so cute. I didn't even see one prostitute or drug deal. Sigh. Good times.

(Awkward photo in front of Pea Patch)



(Wearing Giant Orange Cowboy Hat)


(Lismarie is amazing and pretty and funny and kind and BOUGHT ME A FREAKIN TICKET TO SEATTLE!!!)


AND I got to see Janeece too. OMG. I love my BFFs. Janeece planned a dinner with all my old friends at my favorite restaurant. I felt so bad for our waiter. A Ladies-Night-Out party of 10. Where no one ordered any drinks (besides Diet Coke), and we stayed for almost FIVE HOURS. And we all had coupons for free dessert. We left him a big tip. Poor kid.

(Janeece in her swanky custom kitchen)



It was pretty much the best weekend ever. I don't think any birthday will ever top it. Thank you Lismarie, you are amazing and I am so lucky to have you as my friend. I don't know what I did to deserve you. I might as well just stop celebrating my birthday. I've reached the pinnacle of Birthday Wishes. (Did I mention the Chinese hot-stone massages Lismarie booked? No. Yeah, it was as amazing as it sounds... Seriously, nothing can top it.)

Then I came home. And I readjusted to my children. My tolerance for whining was greatly diminished by my relaxing weekend, so I had to really work hard at being a Nice Mom.

My Super Awesome Friend J has the hook-ups for all things Free & Fabulous. In the past two days we've:
-Gotten a free sitting for a photo shoot at JC Penney's & a bunch of pictures for only $11. (Gretchen is a model-in-the-making. She was totally into the posing. She even snuck into a few shots she wasn't supposed to be in.) (It was the first time I'd ever taken my girls to a photo place for portraits. I'm such a photo snob usually, I make Lismarie or Christiana take pictures. Because when your BFFs are professional photographers, why would you go to the mall??? But this was super fun. I'm totally sold.)

-Joined the "Kids Club" at the mall. And got free suckers from See's candy, stickers, t-shirts, and ree hot dogs. Dude. Did I mention we live across the street from the mall? We are totally going to get our $'s worth out of that.

-Went to Home Depot to do the free craft. Have you ever done this before? It is SO FUN. On the first Saturday of each month most Home Depots have a craft for kids. They get an orange apron, access to tools, and make.....something. And you don't even have to clean it up! (Well, we helped, but we didn't have to deal with the paint droppings my children scattered across the tarps.)

My High School self is making fun of me for how much time we've spent at the mall. We only let the kids ride this lame money-sucking ride once. But they stayed and played on it and TWO RANDOM STRANGERS came up and gave them $ to go on it. People in Reno are so nice. (And we need to talk to our kids about not taking stuff from strangers. But still, SO NICE.)




Gretchen was really really REALLY intense about her "Picket Fence Planter". She painted the whole thing by herself. Look at her concentration skills!



And then we met Ella's kindergarten teacher for Brunch. I love her. We're going to their house for a BBQ tonight. Her daughter is so sweet and quiet and REALLY not sure what to think of my girls. But they let us hang out with them anyway...



Birthday Bonanza. What did I tell you?

And yesterday Amber babysat for a few hours so I could go spend my birthday money WITHOUT CHILDREN. I got some cute stuff. And this morning I dyed my hair brown. It's like I'm a new woman. I know.

Now, if Colby could find a fantastic job, I'm pretty sure our life would be perfect.

The End.

Grandma Leaving And Toothsome Adventures

Hello Friends!!!



I finally found my camera cord, so I can upload pictures again.

Boxes are fun!


Grandma left on Friday. It's official. Grandma and Grandpa don't live here anymore. This is how we feel about their absence:

(Except for that happy person on the end. That must be Gretchen thinking about candy. I think I'm the disembodied head. So overcome with emotion that I've lost my lower-half.)

We met Anita for lunch on Thursday before she left. There were lots of kisses and hugs.



And because we couldn't stand to let her go just yet, we met her at a friends and had pizza together. This friend got one of those new swim spas. I WANT I WANT I WANT. Seriously. It's at the top of my list. As soon as we get our own house, I'm getting one. Gretchen was SO into it. As you can see:







In other news....

Do you ever have those dreams where your teeth are falling out? I do. ALL. THE. TIME. It doesn't help that I've actually knocked my front teeth out before. And that the endodontist told me that, "It could easily happen again." So imagine my joy when Ella shows me her loose teeth. (Seriously, I may throw up. I get light-headed every time she wiggles them. And the dentist gave us a 2 week deadline to get them out ourselves. I'm supposed to TWIST THEM. Ugh. UGH! I can't handle that. COLBY HELP!!!!)



Gretchen is convinced that her teeth are loose too.

Second Floor Living Without A Yard

So we moved. We now live in 860 sq feet of OUR OWN. It has a view of the Sears parking lot out the living room window. But I still like it. We have no couch, and 2 of the living room walls are covered in boxes. But I still like it. He/We decided NOT to unpack our kitchen stuff (after Colby informed that it was "buried" in our storage unit in the back corner. Way to plan ahead, I know.) So I scrounged up some basic kitchen supplies (I love you Julie!), bought 4 plates & 4 bowls from the thrift store, and invested in some plastic wear. I also bought:
-1 teal can opener
-1 ceramic knife
-1 cutting board
-1 set of measuring spoons and cups
It's amazing how little kitchen stuff you need when you get creative. Like using plates for pan lids when you make rice. Or using your husband's pressure cooker to boil noodles. And pre-cutting all your food before serving since you don't own any table knives. And never using the dishwasher because you don't even own a full wash-load full of dishes. But I still like it.

Gretchen was shocked into submission with the move. She became "shy". She wants me to hold her all the time. But I have time to hold her, and it keeps her from running away when we're in public. So I like it.

Ella is on Spring Break this week. Apparently the school district just throw darts at the calender to pick the dates for the holiday (Really? NO WHERE NEAR EASTER? And a whole month after the university/community college break. Really?) So far we've celebrated Spring Break by waking up at the normal 6:30, watching Alvin & The Chipmunks, and playing with our friends. Next up. Trip to the grocery store. Don't be jealous of our Rockstar life. (But I still like it.)

Last week we went to a post-Easter-Egg-Hunt (kind of a Last-Hurrah-Leftover-Extravaganza). Ella and Gretchen totally got sunburned. And today it was snowing sideways.

Dear Spring,

We miss you. Please come again soon.

Love,

Us.


Dear Everyone Else,

Let us know if you hear of any amazing Marketing Positions open. I've got a highly qualified and motivated prospective employee here...

Love,

Us Again.

xoxoxo